Friendship Disconnect Brought To You By Facebook

Image“Are you coming to the lake on the Fourth?”

“I wasn’t planning on it.  Why?”

“Oh.” An uncomfortable pause followed by the next idiotic statement.  “We’re having a get together.  Didn’t you see it on Facebook?”


Last November, I deleted my personal Facebook page, and conversations like these are becoming increasingly more frequent.  “Oh, I thought I invited you,” or “Why didn’t you come to my house-warming party?”  I hear this all the time.  And frankly, it used to piss me off.  Now, I just laugh and say, “Call me next time.”

Don’t get me wrong.  Facebook is a lovely place to meet folks you haven’t seen in forever, or talk with your great-aunt ya-ya who lives in Alaska.  But to rely solely on social media to converse with your friends and family (yes, I said FAMILY) is impersonal and a jerk thing to do.

In actuality, I’ve become a good old-fashioned homebody who would love nothing more than to sit at my laptop and finish editing my writing.  But it doesn’t change how I feel about the situation.  I miss hearing from my friends.  What happened to a phone call where you actually hear your friend’s voice, or even a text if that suits those of us who hate it when your phone sticks to your face from yaking so long?

Maybe I’m rambling about nothing, but it still doesn’t ease the sting when your friends forget you exist.  I know what you’re going to say.  Call or text them first.  But I will counter your suggestion and say that I have.  Numerous times.  It doesn’t work.  I’m lucky if I get a text in return.  They keep on “Facebooking” and I stay in the dark.

I can see some of you shaking your head. “Make another profile and quit your whining!”  But you wouldn’t believe the amount of work I get done now that I don’t have that dreaded ball and chain lurking behind my word document.  Believe it or not, I like the freedom.  Makes me feel like a rebel.  On the other hand, I don’t like losing my friendships in the process.

I’m going to go on as a former Facebooker, and say, do us all a favor.  Call a sister up next time!


5 thoughts on “Friendship Disconnect Brought To You By Facebook

  1. I admire your dedication to opting-out of social media. It is kind of intrusive though. To be honest I hate being called up most of the time, it’s usually at awkward or inconvenient times. You begin to despise that all too familiar iphone ‘buzz’. I guess texting would be the solution there… I digress, I would follow in your footsteps but that would cut my social circle and event awareness to nil, would lose touch with most people. Catch 22.. ahh

  2. I agree with you. It isn’t like people are going to revert back to the old days. Pandora’s box has been opened, and you either get on board or you don’t. It’s funny that you say you dread the phone call buzz. I do too really. I always wait for the voicemail and then decide if I want to call them back. And don’t think I’ll answer an unknown number. Ha!

  3. I have Facebook but I don’t look at it religiously for the same reason (productivity or lack thereof) and I’ve had that same problem. People seem hurt when I don’t know about their various successes/parties etc., yet if I didn’t catch it on FB, how could I know?! Nicely done!

  4. “Dear Facebook, We Need to Talk”

    Was the title of a blog post I wrote back in 2011 when I was having a bumpy relationship with FB and finally decided to dump him….err I mean it! (you can Google it or maybe the link will work below – let’s try!)

    But Twitter….ahh Twitter has become my number one Social Media outlet & source for rich professional development….but my friends? They have to email, call, or text me cause yeah…I don’t DO Facebook. And I’m better off for it!

    Great post Griffyn! Love that you rock the Y like I do! 😉

    ~Gwyneth Jones
    The Daring Librarian

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